The Double Edged Sword
by Angel360-Devil0
Summary: We are all faced with difficult choices every day. And then some make the "right" choice; others make the "wrong" choice. They are a double-edged sword, like most things in life. Claire's thoughts at the end of "Needs", Episode 8. Slight swearing.


**A/N: **Hey people out there! I'm back, and with a one-shot too, my very first! I hate writing short things, but I just had to flesh out this idea down after last night's episode. I couldn't go to sleep without writing it down! Oh, and when I said I'm back...well, here's my story.

A long, long, time ago--okay, maybe not that long ago--I published a fanfic here called Helpless Indulgence, a MelliexPaul centric fic, the first one of its kind, and one of the first multi-chapter fics pusblished in the Dollhouse section. It was basically a little romance piece documenting how she "fell" for him and all that romance jazz. This was, of course, back when we didn't know (or think) Mellie was actually a Sleeper Active named November put out to "distract" Paul Ballard from finding the Dollhouse. So when Episode Six, Man on the Street, came along...yeah, I deleted the fanfic. The episode was way overwhelming, and now that I know a little bit more about November, I think I can flesh out a few things and re-publish it, considering that there's still no MelliexPaul fanfic out there. Let's see...what I'm trying to say here is, if you'd like to see it again, for old time's sake or just think the plot (whatever I gave of the plot) sounds interesting, review or PM me. It'll get to my email either way.

So if you don't remember the summary for this current fanfic, or why you're here reading this, here's a little recap: After Boyd left Claire after their "talk" at the end of the episode, what was going through Claire's mind? Come on, you had to be wondering about that! Sorry TopherxClaire fans, no romance here, although I wanted to put in a little bit more about Topher...but that's besides the point. God, I love that couple, as much as MelliexPaul. Anyway, I should let you go.

**Disclaimer: I, Angel360-Devil0, do so solemnly swear that I claim no ownership of Dollhouse. The show is in the ownership of FOX and Joss Whedon.**

So let's get crack-a-lackin'!

* * *

We are all faced with difficult choices every day. And then some make the "right" choice; others make the "wrong" choice. They are a double-edged sword, like most things in life.

So it was no surprise that Dr. Claire Saunders was thinking about that after her little chat with Boyd Langton, after he had left her alone in her office for the night. It had been HER idea to do all of this (a much better idea than Topher's, no doubt), and it had gone as planned.

So why did she feel so guilty?

Maybe it was because of what she had found out after Echo, Sierra, Victor, and November received their closure. During the sudden blackout, Topher—later Adelle—had been held at gunpoint—by Echo. One finger pulling the trigger could have sent the Dollhouse into oblivion. One finger was a second away from ruining the test—and taking two lives along with it. No, the trigger was pulled, but only on Topher's "toys". It was fixable. But one finger could have destroyed everything.

Things worked themselves out.

Or maybe it was because Boyd had shown how much he cared for Echo. It was a bond, unnatural, like nothing she had ever seen throughout her time working in the Dollhouse. He had guessed most of the reasons why Echo, Sierra, Victor, and November were sent out. He was the only one who cared, really. Not even Adelle cared for the full reasoning behind her plan. It was all business to her. Pile up the sandbags together, get the job done. Four of the Actives needed closure more than the rest: November to grieve for her deceased daughter, Sierra to confront the man who had sent her to the Dollhouse, Echo to fulfill her desire to free everyone in the Dollhouse, and Victor…he needed to "get the girl", Sierra. Get the job done.

It was done.

Claire knew damn well she was one of the very few who TRULY gave a shit about the well-being of the Actives, all of them, not just Echo, which was Boyd's mentality. Maybe he did care for all of the Actives, but not as much as he cared for Echo. She was special, but special didn't have a positive connotation, oh no, it had an eerie, ominous, a foreboding connotation. Special is what happened with Alpha, special…is what happened to Claire's face. She lightly ran her fingers over her face, where the scars were—or once were—bleeding, shining in the light, like rubies. The scars closed up, but they were still a dull red. Now, they were almost gone, a memory that didn't quite fade to black. They looked like long paper cuts…

But they weren't.

* * *

"_When Echo was leading them out, I would have liked to have seen that. Even if it was all a game—your game." Boyd had said and started making his way to the door._

"_Do you think I had fun?" Claire asked him, stopping him before he left. He turned around to face her._

"_I don't know you very well."_

"_You have to look after Echo. I have to look after all of them. She wasn't leading them to freedom; she was leading them to a world of terror and chaos that would've destroyed them."_

"_She's not leading them anywhere anymore."_

"You should be grateful."

"_Yeah. I'll work on that."_

* * *

She didn't have fun. It was a very risky game, one she didn't plan on playing again anytime soon. Tricking Echo like that, convincing her that she couldn't receive help from the inside. Claire wasn't a friend to Echo; she couldn't be. Even after watching Mike being Wiped, she knew she had tricked Echo in the back of her mind. She couldn't be friends with Echo. She let out a small, shaky sigh and headed out of her office, but stopped at the threshold. One last thought before leaving the Dollhouse behind for the night.

We are all faced with difficult choices every day. And then some make the "right" choice; others make the "wrong" choice. They are a double-edged sword, like most things in life. Her idea came to her during that meeting, and she decided to voice it. Was it on tacit orders from Adelle? To get the job done? It certainly was a double-edged sword—the test almost got out of hand—but as Adelle would say, the situation was under control.

_Even if it was all a game._ Claire willed herself to close the door to her office and leave the woes behind—for the night. Then when she'd return tomorrow, it would all come back again. And again. And again.

* * *

**A/N: **Ominous and foreboding eh? Yup, I know it's not as good as the other stuff I've read around here, but hey, at least I tried, right?

And since you are all Dollhouse fans, love for the show ranging, I'd say you'd be interested in another fanfic. Lab Rat. Remember those words, from last night's episode? That's the title of my Total Drama Island fanfic. Look, it's TDI, but it's based on Dollhouse, right down to the dialogue. Okay, a few Engagements are taken out, the MelliexPaul conflict doesn't exist, Sleeper Actives don't exist, but that's besides the point. All of the episodes are portrayed in this fanfic, except for elements of "Ghost", and the Engagements in "Man on the Street", "Echoes", and "Needs" (heh, there were none), the latest episode. Elements of them will exist, don't worry, just not the episodes down to a T like I did with Episodes 2-5. It's under the Cartoons section (yes, it is a cartoon), Total Drama Island. Or just go to my profile. Don't worry about details of the characters, they are described, along with the whole premise of the actual show. It's designed like that to give off a futuristic and ominous air.

Yeah, sorry for the self-promo there. So, what did you think? I'd love to read it! So just drop a line or two--in a review! Hey, that rhymed!

Oh, and did you notice something with the one-sentence paragraphs? Put them all together, and what do you get? A very ominous message. See if you can find it, and I'll see if you're right. Just drop a line in a review.


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